New life

How does it feel to bring a new life into this world? I've been "hmming and haaing" over this question ever since I've gotten married.

Ever since I've gotten married my husband and I have talked about having kids soon but I'm not sure whether I'm up to it. Whether I'll be a great mum? Whether we're financially ready? Whether I'm brave enough to go through labour pains? So many questions to ponder yet somewhere inside my brain back there I have this inkling that I do want to have one but am scared of all the unanswered questions.

Having more exposure to the latest technology and making use of it like the internet and not forgetting my favourite channel in Astro, Travel and Living Health channel, I've been researching a lot of my questions on the net as well as finding out some answers on the tele. I'm not sure whether I'm ready after reading and finding out more answers but I guess I'm beginning to toy with the idea of having kids isn't that scary after all.

So keeping fingers cross that everything will be fine and less scary when the inevitable happens. So new life, new career in the line soon. God has been merciful and I'm hoping He will take my hand and lead me all the way. :)

Unanswered questions

Lately a lot has been going through my mind.

After the country's election, I wonder how the new politicians will be able to prove themselves, to able to prove that they're much better than the old government, whether the older government will find dirty tactics and ways to bring down the new government. After a few days I stopped reading the papers too. All I find inside are depressing news of how the old government are acting, being sour grapes. Even the new government aren't working among themselves. Power crazy maybe? Who knows? But it's a depressing news.

I felt exhilaration for a couple of days when I decided to throw caution against the wind and resigned without a job. This is the first for me, and it feels great. I thought that I would worry about how I will be able to find ways and means to pay for my commitments but surprisingly I did not have any niggling feeling at all. It came about when my manageress decided to be her normal self and act like the demented ever-barking dog she is. Not in the terms of barking orders but more of barking because she's not please about any single thing. In one word, I've had my patience worn thin when I'm being rebuked by someone for no particular reason. Thank God I wasn't the only one who wasn't in her good books. At least it didn't made things as miserable as it was but I really pitied all the uncles in my organization who have been pressured by her endlessly. One of these days I'm just worried a blood pressure in their body will burst and a stroke will occur. Unsurprisingly this has happened to numerous other parties but I guess management has turn a blind eye to it.

Yesterday was Good Friday and as I attended mass I was nearly brought to tears when I think back of how the Son of God has suffered intentionally for our sins, my sins. It has never gotten to me this deep. The vision of the movie, Passion of the Christ came into my mind when the sermon was given.

So, not literally being weepy but been thinking more and more of things happening around me, in my life. Some good and some bad. Nothing unusual about that I'd admit. Just feel a little hopeless at times how things come about. Maybe I should spent more quiet time with God and maybe a little practicing of what I've read in The Secret might help eh? I wonder how well it works?

Is it worth it?

After a long break during the Chinese New Year, I came back with new vigour and determination to work my ass off. I started to get the ball rolling for both projects. I’ve been busy travelling, visiting branches and it’s been a real eye-opener. What I meant in terms of an eye-opener meaning how things are run in this organisation. My job is to ease the burdens of these branches by being the eyes and ears as well as the voice to the management but I’ve been failing miserably in this aspect. With constant figures and feedbacks from the branches and having presented them to the management, they seem to be in denial how badly things are at the branches. Rather than figuring out how to lend a hand, the management prefer to find more faults with the branches which cause more anger and resentment among the employees at branches. Now I understand why my predecessors left the organisation and why I’m stuck in my current position now.

At times, a sense of helplessness overcomes me and I just feel moody whole day long, and it doesn’t help with the new dragon lady acting exactly like a dragon, forever breathing fire and snarling away. It makes me appreciate my previous boss, even if he lacks certain leadership skills.

Tell me, how do you actually succeed in being a better employee when you’re being screamed at for taking initiative to do things better and having your self confidence and effort being ripped apart when you try to get advice from a dragon lady? I’m lost for words as to how do I actually describe the scenario here. Even with constant stream of words of wisdom and encouragement from the Bible, I’m still at a loss here. I’ve never felt so helpless, useless and demotivated in my life. It makes me wonder whether getting pounded by verbal abuse everyday is worth every penny earned?

The past weeks incidents has got me thinking whether what I’ve earned so far in this organisation, will it be a waste to just throw it all away for the sake of my own health and happiness?

It’s time to sit back, pray, evaluate and find out what are my main priorities in life.

Gong Xi Fa Cai

Yes. The year of the Rat is looming over us and it's coming in 5 more days. I always look forward to Chinese New Year every year as it's the time when my brother and sister used to come back from overseas during the uni breaks and we would all have great fun. Well, now it's different where now I look forward to go back to spend time with my parents and my siblings as well during CNY ever since I started studying and working in KL.

2008's CNY has been a pretty quiet one. Not much of festivities around. I don't feel there's much celebration in the air, probably due to the increase of price in everything, that everyone's watching what they spend this year.

Oh well, I still find it's a good time to catch up with friends and relatives. This year is no different. I usually go out with a bunch of friends in KL for a round of Yee Sang before going back home for CNY but since most of the gang are already not around, this year's lou sang is only with a small group, 3 of us to be exact. The remaining of the gang will be meeting up after CNY which will be great fun. We decided to go to Din Tai Fung which is located in The Gardens. Why we chose this location was by chance. I actually wanted to go there to check out the decorations for Mid Valley this year but it was disappointing. Not as what I expected it to be. I find Pavilion's decoration much better this year.




Anyway, we of course had our Yee Sang. Salmon Yee Sang to be exact. I was pleasantly surprised to find the service at Din Tai Fung pretty good. As they added the plum sauce, oil, and other ingredients, the waitress actually made several CNY wishes. I'm impressed with that.





We ordered a separate dish for ourselves, a-la carte as there weren't a lot of us, and we decided to keep things simple, so we had preserved mustard and pork la mien which tasted really fresh but the soup still had great taste, prawn and pork dumpling la mien which is also a remarkable dish. I decided to go against the norm and ordered a seafood udon. The prawns were really fresh and most succulent. Yummy! Since this is just like a pre-CNY dinner, not much photos of food here. Will upload more after we've had our proper yearly CNY dinner after we're all back from our hols. But do enjoy the pictures that I took at each of the malls that I managed to go. :)






So, a Happy and Prosperous Chinese New Year to you all!!! Enjoy your holidays. See you guys when I get back.

Painting the town "red"

Having an extra holiday in between the week has always been welcomed news. Of course like most people whenever there’s a holiday I try to get some house chores done or to laze around but this round my husband and I had to do some entertaining of relatives that came from outstation. So we hit the malls for some CNY shopping. It was no as crowded as I expected it to be. We could easily find a parking whenever we went to a different mall, other than the normal jam at Bukit Bintang. We managed to scour 2 malls within 4 hours and we did manage to find pretty good deals.

Of course any outing will include good food. But we did not get it at the mall; we decided to go and get food at the pasar malam near my area. Sorry, but no pictures here as we were ravenous when we got back so we started digging in before any pictures could be taken. After we finished eating we suddenly smelt kerosene in the air. At first we thought that it came from behind of the house as some houses were doing some renovation but the smell actually came from the front. We went out to check out where the smell was wafting in from and we saw that some brainless ah long (useless human being who are rich enough to lend people $ but use uncivilised ways to get the $ back from the borrower) decided to embarrass my next door neighbour by throwing red paint, not knowing that this particular neighbour of hours has a skin thicker than any rhino or elephant in the world. They have gotten this kind of treatment at least 3 to 4 times so we ignored it as we’re not the typical nosey Malaysian. Anyway, we went back to clear up the table after eating and when it was time to send our relatives off, we were about to get into the car when we realised that the paint also splashed on our car!!!!!! Then only we saw another plastic bag with paint in our compound as well.

The whole situation made me see red immediately, not because of the red paint but because I was fuming. Out of no reason, we had to suffer due to some incompetent idiot. I mean, good Lord. If you’re really an ah long, might as well go up to the house and throw the paint directly not go pass in a motorbike and throw 2 plastic bags of paint. Really, one word for these guys, F**KING NO BALLS!!!! Well, of course other than fuming the whole night, we had to do something before the paint really set in so my husband had to quickly go out and get turpentine to get the paint off. Luckily the paint of the car did not come off with the red paint. We took at least 4 hours to get the paint off the car and wash the compound and sad to say, not even a word of sorry from the bloody next door neighbour.

The best part of the story is, when we called 999, the operator that picked up asked us to call the police station nearest to us and make the report. So after calling the police station and explaining the situation, the police had the nerve to actually tell us to go to the station and make the report. So much for Cekap dan Mesra slogan by the police force. It’s a useless slogan. Might as well change it to Lambat dan Pengecut. So, I wonder how the government expect the public to trust the police to protect and help us if they can’t even solve such simple things. At least have the decency to come over and look, take some pictures and take down our statement rather asking us to go over to the station. But then again, as usual putting hopes in these people is like putting hope in a pile of shit! Useless! Sigh!

Petrol future for 2008

This article below got me thinking. Based on what I received earlier of the day to boycott all means of pumping petrol on 24^th of January 2008, this article was sent to me by a friend working in Shell. Some of you might say that it is a way to make his stand in showing his commitment to the company but some of you might also say it has a true ringing to it as well.

We all know that oil and all the resources will one day finish and it’s up to the government of the country to actually find ways and means to find substitutes for the fuel via solar, wind or hydroelectricity and etc. What has our government of Malaysia been doing I wonder? Any comments on this??

From: Jeroen van der Veer, Chief Executive To: All Shell employees Date: 22 January 2008 Subject: Shell Energy Scenarios

Dear Colleagues

In this letter, I'd like to share reflections about how we see the energy future, and our preferred route to meeting the world's energy needs. Industry, governments and energy users - that is, all of us - will face the twin challenge of more energy and less CO₂.

This letter is based on a text I've written for publication in several newspapers in the coming weeks. You can use it in your communications externally. There will be more information about energy scenarios in the months ahead.

By the year 2100, the world's energy system will be radically different from today's. Renewable energy like solar, wind, hydroelectricity and biofuels will make up a large share of the energy mix, and nuclear energy too will have a place.

Mankind will have found ways of dealing with air pollution and greenhouse gas emissions. New technologies will have reduced the amount of energy needed to power buildings and vehicles.

Indeed, the distant future looks bright, but getting there will be an adventure. At Shell, we think the world will take one of two possible routes. The first, a scenario we call Scramble, resembles a race through a mountainous desert. Like an off-road rally, it promises excitement and fierce competition. However, the unintended consequence of "more haste" will often be "less speed" and many will crash along the way.

The alternative scenario, called Blueprints, has some false starts and develops like a cautious ride on a road that is still under construction. Whether we arrive safely at our destination depends on the discipline of the drivers and the ingenuity of all those involved in the construction effort. Technical innovation provides for excitement.

Regardless of which route we choose, the world's current predicament limits our maneuvering room. We are experiencing a step-change in the growth rate of energy demand due to population growth and economic development, and Shell estimates that after 2015 supplies of easy-to-access oil and gas will no longer keep up with demand.

As a result, society has no choice but to add other sources of energy - renewables, yes, but also more nuclear power and unconventional fossil fuels such as oil sands. Using more energy inevitably means emitting more CO₂ at a time when climate change has become a critical global issue.

In the Scramble scenario, nations rush to secure energy resources for themselves, fearing that energy security is a zero-sum game, with clear winners and losers. The use of local coal and homegrown biofuels increases fast.

Taking the path of least resistance, policymakers pay little attention to curbing energy consumption - until supplies run short. Likewise, despite much rhetoric, greenhouse gas emissions are not seriously addressed until major shocks trigger political reactions. Since these responses are overdue, they are severe and lead to energy price spikes and volatility.

The other route to the future is less painful, even if the start is more disorderly. This Blueprints scenario sees numerous coalitions emerging to take on the challenges of economic development, energy security and environmental pollution through cross-border cooperation.

Much innovation occurs at the local level, as major cities develop links with industry to reduce local emissions. National governments introduce efficiency standards, taxes and other policy instruments to improve the environmental performance of buildings, vehicles and transport fuels.

As calls for harmonization increase, policies converge across the globe. Cap-and-trade mechanisms that put a cost on industrial CO₂ emissions gain international acceptance. Rising CO₂ prices accelerate innovation, spawning breakthroughs. A growing number of cars are powered by electricity and hydrogen, while industrial facilities are fitted with technology to capture CO₂ and store it underground.

Against the backdrop of these two equally plausible scenarios, we will only know in a few years whether December's Bali declaration on climate change was just rhetoric or the beginning of a global effort to counter it. Much will depend on how attitudes evolve in Beijing , Brussels , New Delhi and Washington .

Shell traditionally uses its scenarios to prepare for the future without expressing a preference for one over another. But, faced with the need to manage climate risk for our investors and our grandchildren, we believe the Blueprints outcomes provide the best balance between economy, energy and environment.

For a second opinion, we appealed to climate change calculations made at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. These calculations indicate that a Blueprints world with CO₂ capture and storage results in the least amount of climate change, provided emissions of other major manmade greenhouse gases are similarly reduced.

The sobering reality is that the Blueprints scenario will only come to pass if policymakers agree a global approach to emissions trading and actively promote energy efficiency and new technology in four sectors: heat and power generation, industry, mobility and buildings. It will be hard work and there is little time.

For instance, Blueprints assumes CO₂ is captured at 90% of all coal- and gas-fired power plants in developed countries in 2050, plus at least 50% of those in non-OECD countries. Today, there are none. Since CO₂ capture and storage adds cost and brings no revenues, government support is needed to make it happen quickly on a scale large enough to affect global emissions. At the very least, companies should earn carbon credits for the CO₂ they capture and store.

Blueprints will not be easy. But it offers the world the best chance of reaching a sustainable energy future unscathed, so we should explore this route with the same ingenuity and persistence that put humans on the moon and created the digital age.

The world faces a long voyage before it reaches a low-carbon energy system. Companies can suggest possible routes to get there, but governments are in the driving seat. And governments will determine whether we should prepare for a bitter competition or a true team effort.

That is the article, and how I see our challenges and opportunities. I look forward to hearing how you see the situation (please be concise).

Regards

Jeroen van der Veer
Chief Executive

A second chance

As I read the paper this morning a title in the paper caught my attention. It says, “A second chance for strays - Dogs rounded up by MPSJ to be offered for adoption".

Firstly, I applaud and salute the MPSJ for doing this. They are the first council in Malaysia that I hear actually show a positive attitude towards strays. And furthermore, the MPSJ president is Datuk Adnan Md Ikhsan. In the section, quoted from the Star, "According to MPSJ president Datuk Adnan Md Ikhsan, stray dogs rounded up by the council would first be put up for adoption before they are put down. He added that the MPSJ did not want euthanasia to be the only option in countering the problem. "We would prefer that the dogs are given second chance by those willing to take them into their homes as pets or as guard dogs for their farms, " said Adnan. Bravo!! I really respect him for doing this. He is the first council head and a Malay as well who actually don't want to see dogs being put to death for no reason. At least he's giving them a second chance unlike other councils, all they know is to kill that's all.

Honestly I have nothing about Malays not liking dogs as I know it's something to do with their religion but at least have the courtesy like Datuk Adnan to give the animals a second chance. I really hope that other councils would learn from him to take this action. Dogs, cats, guinea pigs, hamsters, iguanas are all pets. They should not suffer just because they are strays where maybe some irresponsible owners out there couldn't control or teach their pets, they rather choose the easy way of letting them go astray, hoping that the pets can find food in the rubbish bin.

I know that all the pet shops nowadays offer beautiful dogs and cats for sale. Those are breeder dogs, and boy do they cost a lot. So, it is a wise decision for Datuk Adnan to let the dogs be adopted. They make better pets even compared to some expensive breed. Anyway, hasn't there been many medical articles talking about how keeping a pet actually reduces the chances of a person getting a heart attack?

Again, I salute and pay my highest respect to the MPSJ for being the first to initiate this adoption campaign. Good job!